I miss my dad.

I’ve never said those words before tonight.

But I knew one day I would. Just not tonight…

I was just sitting in bed. Thinking:

“what can i do”

“what do i do in the meantime”

“how can i be the best version of me”…

And then with all my pride, I opened my mouth I asked God aloud “How can I serve you? Help me to be who I need to be.”

And then it started… I started thinking about my dad. I started to think about the reality of my relationship with my father… it had been nonexistent for years… just complete silence.

And now more than anything, I wish he was here.

 

I wish we hadn’t been stuck in our egos and had just shown each other the love we both deserved…

I asked and I was given. As I took the time to just let myself unravel I thought to myself…

Is this apart of the process?? Is this something that I needed because I had been filled with such resentment and was unconscious for so long and never realized it? Was God telling me to love? to give love and also RECIEVE IT… because honestly, I haven’t been.

❤ ❤

When it’s the right time God will show you your true self… and what you do with that truth is up to you.

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